#113

Translated from the original Kissgalog

A. *We’re going to have to break this kiss eventually*
B. *But why stop now?*
A. *Not now, but soon enough*
B. *Someday*
A. *Today*
B. *No need to be hasty*
A. *I think that’s a more than fair timeframe*
B. *No need to decide anything just yet*
A. *I know, I know. But, this can’t go on forever*
B. *It can’t?*
A. *No! We eventually need to drink and eat and not ever poop in a plastic bag*
B. *…Paper?*
A. *I never thought I’d miss the bathroom so much*
B. *So… not paper*
A. *I think that would be worse than plastic*
B. *Really? How so?*
A. *Plastic is more immune to seepage*
B. *Oh, yeah. Didn’t think of that. I guess I assumed a solid only*
A. *Ok. Can we not talk about poop-types while we’re kissing?*
B. *You brought it up*
A. *It’s just not sexy*
B. *We’ve been kissing for almost 14 hours. Sexy is no longer part of this*
A. *I don’t know that I’d go that far*
B. *Yeah?*
A. *I mean, not right now. But it comes and goes*
B. *Rats. Next time you should tell me*
A. *Why? I mean, I will. But*
B. *Maybe I can make it a little better for you*
A. *Oh I don’t like the sound of that*
B. *There’s nothing in the rules that says we can’t make it*
A. *We have to stay standing upright. The whole time.*
B. *Eh, we can probably make that work*
A. *Upright?*
B. *I mean, I’m just talking hands*
A. *I’m not going to have you j me o in a packed auditorium*
B. *Hey, who knows. Maybe by then it will be less crowded– they’re going to have start breaking up their kisses eventually*
A. *No*
B. *Just give me a heads up is all… well, not too up*
A. *Nuh*
B. *Mm*
A. *Nooo*
B. *Mmm, sorry. Just got re-lost in the kiss for a second*
A. *See?*
B. *I see, I see. Must have been all that talk of getting you off*
A. *Well at least it worked for somebody*
B. *How about you? How’s your kiss*
A. *All I’m getting is lipmush*
B. *Yeah, now I’m back there too. But for a moment it felt just like the first time all over again*
A. *Huh. Lucky you*
B. *The luckiest. Eugh. Yeah. My tongue has completely re-lost all meaning*
A. *What did it mean before?*
B. *Truth? Love? Justice*
A. *That’s a heavy burden for one small tongue*
B. *Ain’t so small*
A. *Maybe. If we didn’t use tongue it would be easier…*
B. *No! C’mon. Our tongues are a moral argument*
A. *But no one else is*
B. *If no one else was jumping off the Brooklyn Bridge, would you?*
A. *No. I wouldn’t. That’s, my point*
B. *It’s not that tall (1), (2) you’d survive, and (3) everyone would think you’re the coolest*
A. *I don’t really see how that’ s moral, tho…*
B. *I meant to use a better analogy*
A. *I know*
B. *The world’s longest kiss shouldn’t be some lips only, press & forget, 2-day nothing. Our tongues make the case for decency, and substance, and true affection*
A. *Well mine is fili-busted. My jaw hurts. And your mouth tastes like a stale spit sandwich*
B. *If we pull our tongues now we may as well go home*
A. *I am fine with either scenario*
B. *Fine. We can quit frenchin’*
A.
B.
A. *Wow. Mm. Eh, oh. I can, I can taste my own mouth again*
B. *I don’t want to mow down any greener grass dreams of yours, but your mouth isn’t exactly wint-o-green*
A. *& feeling is starting to return to my tongue*
B. *You lost feeling? Mine just felt like our mouths were hosting an eel fight to which I was an oddly empathetic observer*
A. *Yes, of course. I meant to say ‘eel fight’*
B. *I’m not doubting, just saying. Felt like an eel owner at an eel fight who, as the fight got up in rounds, was having a hard time telling which eel was even their eel any more*
A. *Did you win?*
B. *Everyone wins an eel fight– wins eel supper*
A. *Sad*
B. *Not sad. Eel supper!*
A. *Poor Karl*
B. *Karl?*
A. *Your eel*
B. *Ah, right. RIP Karl. RIP, BBQ*
A. *Don’t gloat*
B. *I miss you*
A. *We both miss you, Karl!*
B. *No, no. I miss you*
A. *Is this a symptom? Of dehydration? Or single tongue syndrome?*
B. *No, I just miss you is all*
A. *Well I’m still here*
B. *But it’s not like it used to be*
A. *No, well, maybe it’s bett-*
B. *Instead of calling an end to tongues, we could have made a game of it*
A. *- really?*
B. *Yeah*
A. *My jaw hurt. My tongue is fili-busted. We went over this*
B. *I know.*
A.
B.
A. *What tongue game could we have played?*
B. *Hm. I guess… you know that cherry stem bit?*
A. *Yes. I’m familiar*
B. *Well, instead, we could have done that with tongues*
A. *Oh. That’s not anything*
B. *Or… tried out kewl kissin’ tricks?*
A. *Face it, there are no fun tongue games– kissing is the fun tongue game, and we’ve turned it into a chore*
B. *A soon-to-be world record chore. Only 32-ish hours to go*
A. *Right…*
B. *Only 1 and 1/3 or so day. S.*
A. *Oh god. What are we even doing. I’m calling this*
B. *Nooo– let’s at least hit the 15 hour mark. We’re so close!*
A. *We’re going to have to break this kiss eventually!*
B. *But why stop now?!*
A. *We’re not even kissing. We’re just mushing lips together*
B. *Your jaw hurt. Your tongue*
A. *I know.*
B.
A. *I’m pulling*
B.
A. Sorry
B. 

Advertisements

Tags: , , , , , ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: