On the second day of Christmas

I don’t believe in miracles because-i-mean-c’mon But who doesn’t love a good Christmas-context miracle!? Christopher Hitchens!? Well then I’m glad he’s dead. (Just guessing that by midnight he’ll have died).

One of a bunch of real good moments from that Sesame Street Christmas Special — Cookie Monster Santa Letter, Bert and Ernie Gift of the Magi, Big Bird Beak Icicle, Snap The Whip [go to 7:11 (but it’s all good)], and maybe one that will show up later probably. I catch myself singing it a little every now and then, often when holiday inappropriate, and sometimes I’ll share as it’s a pretty good one to just bust out off-season. Try it– you can really enunciate the “I – don’t know – what one  – is” part and rush together the “andifthatisn’t” and it’s great.

A small list of other True Blue Miracles

My new Christmas Sweater
I can fly back and forth from Los Angeles three times for, like, $15 total.

Thanks, spending everything I earn!


BONUS: check out what THIS FAMILY is up to:

I wish I had traditions! Other than watching Boogie Nights every Thanksgiving. Boy they really like Dunkin Donuts. (They’re not that good you guys– they’re just regular donuts!)

Also: did the grandpa get hair? Is that his miracle? Fuck the Giants.
(Important: I do enjoy this thing (just fuck the Giants (and Dunkin Donuts is only ok (and did the homeless kid freeze to death? (Is THAT the miracle? (dark!)))))…).


What else counts as a miracle?
How bout making a clock work despite a bad turkey infestation, chronic mice atheism, and a severe lack of pupils?

Just because they have no way of taking in images doesn’t mean they don’t have hands. Miracle Hands:

I like that the members of the family pronounce miracle both ways– Jeff Mangum style mEEracles [note: he’s even wearing a Christmas Sweater!] and melk-white (la) mer-acles. The kind of improbable thing that only happens Under the Sea. I guess that would also be ‘Doug Benson doing Buffalo Bill’ style murr-acles.

Anyways, Christmas Miracles– even Trey Parker and Matt Stone know it

Nobody wants to be consistent about pronouncing this dumb thing and none of us can.


I don’t really have a third thing, and feel I should. So here are a bunch of inferior candidates and why they aren’t the one… three:

Not very miraculous; little to no singing.

Too Korean.

Not Korean enough.

UGH– Why Can’t They Just Figure Out The Right Korea Balance!?!?

Ahh. Finally./?


Oh now you’re not even trying.

Eh… I’ll take it!








Really threw myself into it there at the end.


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